Root Causes

“Even now the ax is lying at the root of the trees;”

(John the baptizer, Matthew 3:10a, NRSVUE)

Though we may tend to not recognize it, our mental health issues adversely affect others as well as ourselves. When we ig

nore our issues, we can make those we love miserable. Hopefully, we have understanding partners who don’t judge or condemn us for our idiosyncrasies, but that doesn’t mean we are easy to live with.

My spouse is a saint who has walked with me through years of depression, anxiety, and panic. She’s never complained. I want to change, to be free of that depression, anxiety, and panic, not only because it’s painful for me, but because I love my wife. Love motivates me to want to change.

Too often we attack symptoms rather than root causes. Sometimes, attacking the symptoms is necessary, however. If the symptoms are interfering with my ability to deal with the underlying issues, they must be dealt with first. If my anxiety is too high, or my depression too deep, psychotropic medication, properly prescribed and monitored, can moderate my mood and clear my thoughts so I can deal with the root of the anxiety or depression. But too frequently we take the medication, feel better, and forget about the causes of the problem.

This applies across the board to a plethora of mental health issues – anxiety, panic attacks, depression, hoarding, over-eating, addictions, self-destructive behavior, and so on. All are symptoms of something deeper. It is simplistic to attack the symptom. Telling a person with depression to pop a pill and get over it, telling a hoarder to get rid of the junk, or the alcoholic to stop drinking, is insufficient. We become enablers when we bitch and moan about the symptom without insisting that our loved one get help for whatever the root problem is.

Chopping off the toxic flower without digging up the root only delays the problem. Nothing is solved. But digging up the root is often arduous and painful, which is why we avoid doing so. Familial myths and secrets come to light. Defense mechanisms crumble. Painful truths surface.

This is the stuff of therapy. The skilled therapist creates a safe space where deep hurts, losses, and intergenerational pains can surface and heal. With the roots removed, the symptoms wither. It takes time. It takes work. It takes vulnerability and openness. It takes trust and endurance.

A mild dose of medicine gives me enough stability to engage in therapy where I’m hacking out the roots of my depression, anxiety, and panic.

Also helpful is spiritual direction. In spiritual direction with a trained, wise, spiritual guide, I’m slowly learning what God is really like and who I am at my core. It’s easy to say, “God is love.” It’s something else entirely to know it in my core. I’ve had to jettison many false images of God as harsh judge, irritated father, fed-up master. I’m learning that God is exactly like Jesus – unconditionally kind, caring, accepting, forgiving, and loving.

Coupled with rethinking my understanding of God is replacing my false image of myself. I’m a child of God. I have unsurpassable worth. I bear the image of God. My life is Christ. Again, easy to say; harder to absorb.

Because my image of God and self are being renewed, I now have the ability to engage deeply in therapy. I’m no longer devastated when I face childhood rejections or intergenerational dysfunction. Spiritual direction dovetails nicely with psychotherapy.

As we learn to love ourselves and those with whom we live, our desire to be free of whatever blocks our wholeness increases. Spiritual direction leads me to love God, others, and myself more deeply. Because I love, I desire wholeness. Therapy results in wholeness for those willing to do the work.

God did not create any perfect people. God created good people and invited them on a journey towards wholeness, i.e., unity with Godself. Both spiritual direction and therapy are on-going processes. They aid us in the journey.